


Somewhere Only We Know

by theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Nogitsune Stiles Stilinski, post 3b
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-23
Updated: 2014-07-23
Packaged: 2018-02-10 01:17:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2005443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming/pseuds/theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the Post-3B world of Beacon Hills, everyone has seemingly moved on... except Stiles.  He feels burdened with being the cause of her death and no one can comfort him.  At least not initially.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Somewhere Only We Know

**Author's Note:**

> This is an un-beta'd story that is currently unfinished. I'm currently stuck at the point it is at (all one chapter). It has sat untouched on my computer for 2 months now and I thought I would at least share what I have. If anyone has suggestions on where the plot should go (obviously Stiles and Derek are going to get together.. eventually) let me know! Also if there is horrible grammar or anything, please tell me!

Stiles scrubbed his face with his hands. He was sitting at his desk in his room letting his thoughts eat away at him. It had been a month since everything that had happened with the Nogitsune. He had grown distance, he knew he had. There was an immense amount of guilt inside him that would rear its head at the worst of times.

Like right now, when Stiles could faintly hear a wolf howl in the woods near his house. He longed to be out there in the woods, hanging with Scott, Isaac, and even Derek. But he could not bring himself to it. 

He could not face Scott or Isaac. He knew neither of them blamed him for what had happened to Allison, but the pack would never be the same.

At least, he secretly hoped neither of them blamed him. Truth be told, no one had reached out to Stiles when he had stopped answering text message and phone calls. Perhaps they were just giving him space.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Stiles,” his dad called from somewhere down stairs, “Dinner is ready.”

Stiles pushed off of his desk and rose out of his chair. Nightly dinners with his father. It was the only thing constant in his life.

He walked down the stairs to find his dad in the kitchen, setting already made plates on the table. Tonight’s meal seems to be Rosemary Chicken and asparagus. He lowered himself into a chair at the table.

It was quiet for a few minutes, as each of them cut into their chicken. Mr. Stilinski’s mouth was set in a tight line, as he contemplated how to start a conversation with his son.

“Stiles I…,” he set his fork and knife down and took a breath, “I saw Scott today. He asked how you were.” He glanced up to see that his son had momentarily stopped chewing at the mention of Scott’s name.

Stiles swallowed hard and moved his asparagus around the plate.

“Maybe… Maybe you could call him and tell him how you’re doing. I know it has been hard on you, with everything that happened, but people still care son. Scott asked me to tell you that he, Isaac, Kira, and Lydia were going bowling on Friday. He’d be happy if you would join them.” He stopped for a moment to see if Stiles would say anything. When Stiles said nothing, Mr. Stilinski continued, “They miss you Stiles,” he reached across the table to grab Stiles’ hand, “I miss you.”

And that hurt. Stiles had known deep down that he causing his father pain. Every day when his father came home to see that Stiles had not ventured outside or even left his room, it broke him inside. 

Stiles shook his head solemnly, “Dad I just can’t. I can’t act like everything is okay, like nothing happened a month ago. It’s my fault and nothing anyone says can change that fact.”

“Stiles, no one is asking you to act like it is okay. You’re right, okay? It’s a messed up situation, but let your friends help you. Let me help you. From what everyone has told me, you, Scott, or Allison could have ended up possessed like that. It’s unfortunate that you were the unlucky one, but don’t beat yourself up over it continuously.”

“No dad, you don’t understand. It would never have happened to Scott. He’s an Alpha. He’s strong, stabled minded, and has a wolf to keep him grounded. And Allison, she’s…” he stopped for a moment to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat, “She was a hunter. She was strong, so, so, strong. I am nothing compared to them! I’m 147 pounds of pale skin and fragile bones. I’m a hyperactive kid who puts himself in danger way too much. Of course it was going to be me!” 

Stiles pushed back from the table and ran from the room with his father yelling after him. 

He grabbed the jeep’s keys that were sitting on the end table in the living room and ran out the door. It probably was not his best decision to drive in this state, but he needed to get away from his father and that conversation.

He found himself at the cemetery a while later. It was a place that had become Stiles’ safe haven over the years. He had spent hours talking to his mother’s grave, as well as sitting in the comforting silence. However, it was not his mother’s grave that he found himself at this evening.

He sat down next to the slate gray headstone. His fingers traced the inscription slowly.

“I’m so sorry Allison, for everything I ever said, everything I’ve ever done. I’m sorry I would get annoyed when every conversation Scott would have about you. I’m sorry when I got angry about being the in-between person for you Scott to communicate when you’re parents were crazy. I’m sorry…” 

His voice trailed off as he brought his knees to his chest. He did not hold back the tears this time as his head rested on his knees. It had been a long month of holding everything in, not letting his dad see the real pain, and not letting himself be aware just how much it hurt.

And in this moment, while he was alone and in the place he had cried so many times before, it finally felt okay.

He stayed in that position until it felt like his eyes could no longer produce tears. He wiped his eyes with his flannel sleeve and let his knees drop away from his body. It was only then that he noticed he was not as alone as he thought.

Across the cemetery, he spotted a very familiar black clade person. Derek was not facing him and unless someone had cut off his wolf senses, he knew Stiles was there.

Was this any other occasion, Stiles would have jumped in his jeep and drove away. It’s not that he couldn’t stand Derek… but usually the sourwolf’s mood put a damper on everything. That and being alone with Derek usually ended in Stiles’ being physically harmed in some way or another. But at that moment, Stiles was too worn out to run away.

He didn’t have to wait too long until Derek was walking towards him, both hands in the pocket of his leather jacket.

“Before you say anything, was it my dad or Scott who put you up to this?”

“Put me up to what, Stiles?”

“Following Me.”

“I was not following you. I actually had no idea you were even here until I…” Derek stopped, cutting himself off.

“Until you what?”

“Caught you scent.”

Stiles felt his mouth drop open as he looked up at Derek. “I can’t believe you just said that.” He paused for a moment, “Okay, say I believe that you didn’t know I was here… why are you here then?”

Derek glanced in the direction he had just come, “My family is buried here Stiles.”

“Right, right. I guess I forgot for a second that people might frown upon you burying your entire family in your backyard.”

Derek flinched at the words. Stiles knew it was a low blow, but he still didn’t entirely believe that by pure happenstance they ended up in the same place.

“I thought you of all people would understand having a quiet place to grieve Stiles. Considering what you were just doing.” Derek considered how he would phrase his next sentence, “Stiles you.. you can’t blame yourself for what happened,” the last part coming out in a rush.

“Oh no.” Stiles stood up quickly, “We’re not doing this. We’re going to continue to ignore the giant elephant in the room. I already ran away from my father because he brought it up. Don’t make me run away from here because I won’t have a place to run to.” He was clenching and un-clenching his fists at his side, daring Derek to keep going.

Derek brought his hands up in defeat, “Okay Stiles. But speaking from experience, I know how bad it can be to cage all that guilt up and blame yourself.” He turned and started walking away, “The loft’s always open, by the way. If you ever wanted to…” he paused, “talk.” He didn’t wait for a reply, just continued in the direction Stiles assumed his car was sitting.

Had it of been a month or so earlier, Stiles would have sworn he was dreaming. Derek throwing out an invitation to stop by the loft if he needed was not something that happened even in Stiles’ wildest dreams. The guy was far too brooding to host and entertain guests.

For a moment, Stiles felt like things were back to normal. Here he was commenting on Derek’s brooding behavior like it was nothing.


End file.
